Wave The Flag Of Freedom To Be

I guess I really like flags. Perhaps it is the notion that waving one about says 'Here I Am' to no one in particular and everyone in general. The colors are an expression of the facets of ones personality and the freedom that is evoked when one can truly say 'I Am Who I Am'.

Of course flags often connect folk with a group or a mindset and can provide the waver the illusion of strength that comes from the acceptance in that corporate identity. Raising the flag can symbolise a victory and lowering one signifies mourning and loss.

My flag today is the Rainbow Flag - created to illustrate the diversity among peoples and the unity that emanates from refracted light. This weekend saw the annual celebration of National Coming Out Day. A day when all are encouraged to remove the masks and share who they are with their world. So many of us live in hiding, Unable and unwilling to reveal our truth for fear of the judgement of the world. This fear, so often justified by reality, is crippling and stunts our growth in love as long as we hold on to it.

I have just finished reading 'The Shack' by William P. Young and I am heartened that the understanding that I have, the revelations that I experience are supported throughout this wonderfully inspiring novel. I know that unconditional love is my unwavering thought toward my daughter and that my father feels the same toward me. No matter who I become. what I do or where I go - he will always be with me and always love me.

I may not always please him, ever meet his expectations or often make his heart glad - but I know that he loves me and that he is 'especially fond of me'. How have we humans created and sustained a religion that puts me in a completely different light. It is because humankind has to create systems and hierarchy in a vain attempt to control others and to coerce them into conforming to norms and rules and laws that come from fear not love.

So today COME OUT!! Do not hide yourself any longer, afraid of the opinions and judgements of others, but come into the light, shine as you are and wave your flag with joy for all the world to see. There is no one like you, you are perfect, special and unique. You have intrinsic value that is just bursting to spring forth into the world and share its gifts. Whoever you are you are loved and you are loved for who you are . . . the Spirit that binds us together will also set us free!

Blessings on all who wave the flag of freedom to be!

With Love,

Geoff

Truth or Lies

Throughout the course of history the few have attempted to control the many by a succession of elaborate lies and misinformation. In fact, the easiest way to assume control, be it over an individual or an entire nation, is to be the gatekeepers of information. Those who say what is true and what is not are those who have the minds of others in their hands.

Recently a number of distressing stories have come to light where youngsters have been kidnapped and made to live in a subservient manner with men and women who completely manipulate the truth so that their captives become loyal and dependent on the captors, much like 'Stockholm Syndrome' or the plight of battered wives.

The psychological manipulation is so complete that the victims feel (initially out of fear) unable or unwilling to challenge the status quo. This is a similar dynamic to the capitulation of the German populace to the radical and antisocial commands of Hitler during the 1930's. People, individually or corporately, give over their powers of question and reason to those who control what is essentially seen as the 'truth'. The sad fact is that in most cases the information is not true - it is a lie.

To whit - Santa Claus. Why is it that Westerners insist on telling their children to believe in a fictional figure and then berate them for 'spoiling' the story when they finally wise up and tell their younger siblings the truth?

How have the world's religions been able to foist myth after myth upon their adherents without any tangible evidence of the stories that they insist are pure fact. The truth can only be verified by one's own experience. It cannot be transferred by edict or law or even taken as fact because someone in a power position says that is is so. We must question everything that we think we believe to be sure that it is our choice to value as truth.

So what is our big 'National Secret' in America. What is the lie that we are telling the world about capitalism and enterprise that is the antithesis of unconditional love and acceptance for diversity of thought, practice and experience. Why do we try and force the world as a whole into a mold that is not working for us as a nation. When we are unable to provide for our poor, our elderly, our infirm and our destitute because, as a nation we are pursuing a selfish and superficial dream. The secret that we hold is in fact a lie. That America is the 'land of opportunity' is only part of the story, and offers false hope to so many that cannot find their way out of poverty and isolation. The lie is that America, as a nation, is altruistic, generous and fair. The truth is that America as a nation is greedy and self centered and controlled by a cadre of individuals and corporations who care nothing for anything other than profit and the 'bottom line'.

"Oh say does that Blood Spattered Banner yet wave . . . O'er the Land of Greed and the Home of the Lie"

Where is love and compassion, sharing and interdependence when we are, as a nation, unable to provide Universal Health Care to our own people? What lies are being told to convince people not to question these wrongs but instead to fight for the preservation of a 'liberty' and 'freedom' that has long been taken away!

More to come!

With love, Geoff

O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

I just watched the Lifetime movie 'Prayers for Bobby' for the second time in two nights and I could not help but remember the trauma that I went through as a young man battling with being gay and a Christian and how irreconcilable those positions seemed to be. The story that was being told was one of a young life that was sacrificed, though the end result was that others were set free. Bobby took his own life because he could not face the rejection, couched in 'love', of his close-knit, Catholic family. Rejection is never love however because love, to be love, must be un-conditional. His family learned this, sadly, after his untimely death.


Our Christian teachings are wrong when they condemn a person for being who they are and for what they do. It is never right to try and change another's life. I really know that now as a spiritual principle. Why is what I do, I say, I think, I hope, I wish right or best for anyone but me? And why is what others do, others say, others think and others hope right or best for anyone else but them? Jesus reflects the loving and compassionate essence of a Universal God. Man has added his words to create a book, the Bible, that seeks to legislate a perceived 'way', to be the one and only right way to be. That folk have taken this as truth, without question, makes the Bible one of the most damaging books ever written. As a history book of the gradual development of God-consciousness it is without peer. Without LOVE there is nothing.


For most of my lifetime I have believed that notion of loving the sinner but not the sin. I now see that as false. Unconditional love is just that - a love that has no conditions and no requirements for it's dispensation. The sin and the sinner are one, and as one they are loved. For me or you to judge the actions of another completely ignores the example of Jesus who came to the rescue of a woman caught in the act of adultery who was about to be stoned to death, a consequence congruent with the law of the land - a law based on the unenlightened revelations of the Old Testament. He said to the assembled kangaroo court - 'Let him among you who is without sin cast the first stone'. Of course, no one moved!


Jesus knew that they had it all wrong. He understood the truth of the law of love. He was the enlightened one. They were still mired in the ignorance of partial understanding. Within a year or two they took his life instead and then his followers made it look like it was the plan all along so that the God of their limited understanding could forgive them . . . like Jesus was a necessary sacrifice to satisfy God's sense of justice! How sad that mankind transposed their own feeble notion of the requirements of forgiveness onto the Love Force of the Universe. What loving earthly father would require a recompensive sacrifice in order to forgive his children of anything?


Until Christendom is liberated from the Bible as a handbook, and begins to use it as a history book, the sins of the fathers will still be visited on the children. I am lucky that my dad loved me regardless of my actions and stood by me when others condemned me to hell. Bobby was not so fortunate. My dad reflects God's love because his love is unconditional. Who I am is more valuable to him than the collective misunderstanding of generations. His love for me is without condition, without judgement and requires no forgiveness to access. My mum is the same way. These folk have completely, and perhaps unwittingly overturned the teachings of the church as they have accepted me 'Just As I Am'.


I know that I have survived in order to be a light to shine into the darkness of the lives of those who have not experienced the 'Love That Will Not Let Me Go' - the love that binds us together and unites us as one across all the false barriers and separations that segregate us in the world today. I must let the wounded know that who they are is who they are meant to be. The actions that do harm to others are the ones that must be corrected, the nature of a person is without question something to be accepted and embraced, without comparison to standards and mores that are nothing more than attempts to create conformity for the purpose of control.


Who is to say that my life is any less important or valuable than that of any one else? Who is to say that it is wrong - or right? The only measure is if I love. Period. Like the song from the bohemian musical 'Rent' - we should measure a life in seasons of love. This too is the heartbeat of Christianity - too bad most Christians are stuck with a corpse. The risen Christ is alive in love and compassion.



With love, and in peace - Geoff

A New Year - New Direction

It is January and I have not blogged for three months! My brother told me when I started that the key was to be consistent! I have since found out that he struggled his way to consistency, so, instead of beating myself up I will say - to quote the enduring British (or Aussie) one-hit wonder . . . "I get knocked down, but I get up again, you're never gonna keep me down" . . . ad infinitum!

I am not hot on New Year's Resolutions, but I do believe that it is a perfect time for us to evaluate the direction of our lives and the values that we hold. The cyclical nature of the seasons almost compel us from within to moan with the frosty winds and ache for the newness of Spring - even in Florida, where it is said that we experience three seasons in a single week sometime in January and for the rest of the year it's Summer!

This year past has been extremely challenging, but in terms of growth has been most rewarding. I have come into 2009 a better and more whole person than entered 2008. That I am in my 50's is all the more remarkable because tradition holds that the older we get the more intransigent! For me it seems to be the opposite. Not that I don't like things a certain way, but I am finding that to be willing to let go is far more exciting than having everything 'My Way' - sorry Frank! That I could think that if only people saw it, did it, felt it, enjoyed it the way I did they would surely be happy is very naive. That I could support and encourage them in having it their way is far more satisfying!

So I recalled a teaching of Don Miguel Ruiz who says that the practice of four simple agreements with ourselves will ultimately change the world and I decided to make these the focus of my New Year. I will try to be Impeccable With My Words - I will say what I mean and mean what I say. I will Take Nothing Personally - trying to remember that most everything is not 'about me', it's about the other persons 'stuff'. I will Not Assume Anything - we all know who ends up being the ass! And I Will Do My Best. I really believe that if I practice these principals enough I might master them and then I shall know emotional, spiritual and physical health! Not a bad lot for the year!!

Happy New Year my friends and family!

With Love and Peace, Geoff

England's Green and Pleasant Land

I was privileged to take a journey by train through the heart of England's splendid countryside this week. There is nothing like the rolling hills and pastoral landscape this side of heaven! I have lived in the USA for more than half my life, but I will always call England my home. My cell phone plays 'God Save the Queen' every time I have an incoming call! It is in my heart and my soul. Funny really for one who in their teenage years was convinced that they had been born in the wrong country! I couldn't wait to get to America, where I believed people were real and spoke the truth about themselves and how they felt.

Of course the beauty of the land and the sense of community in the towns and villages do not make up for the reality that folk from the Old World are too deferent for words and much to shy and seemingly afraid to be themselves. It is no wonder that I was attracted to a culture that seemed to put feelings first, where people did not hesitate to say what they thought. The very brashness and self promotion that turns one off the stereotypical Texas tourist at the same time attracted one who felt that a cup of tea did not cure all the problems of life, it just deferred them; one who felt restrained from speaking the truth for fear of offending the sensibilities of others.

My duality of citizenship has given me a unique perspective on the Old and the New and the truth lies somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic! It is in appreciating our oneness and interconnectedness that we best see ourselves as creatures of balance and harmony. I can be equally thrilled by a manicured English garden in Kent or the steamy French Quarter in New Orleans. By the wildness of Dartmoor or the glitter of Times Square in New York! Just as at peace on a crowded Florida beach as climbing the barren peak of Mount Snowdon in Wales. As happy to sit with my aged Uncle and Aunt over a Devonshire Cream Tea or to dance 'til dawn in an edgy Miami nightclub. Grasping the moment and living it with reckless abandon is the answer to the conflicting messages that others might use to control the experience and fullness of our lives.

I am glad that I am an Englishman and I am glad that I am an American because to be both gives me the perspective of a citizen of the world and provides the opportunity to see life from many points of view. That these worlds are different is an understatement, that they can complete each other is the value that I see. We have something to learn from every culture, not to conclude that one is right and the other wrong, but rather to see the complements so ones world view can be enlarged and expanded. If there is one lesson that I will always be grateful for it would be that the world over - and I have travelled to 44 countries in my 54 years - people all share the same desires to be known, to love and be loved and to feel part of a community. Who has the best model? None and all. By blending the spirit of each culture we can together find a way to peace on earth, English and German, American and Arab, Chinese and Israeli. We are one family, diverse and individual yet bound by our common humanity and oneness of spirit!

God Bless America and God Save the Queen!

With Love and Peace!

Geoff

There'll Always Be An England - And Other Thoughts

I am way behind with my postings. Life has been busy. After 6 months of relative calm, following my two surgeries, I have returned to life full-force! I was fortunate in the storm of this economic chaos to be rehired by my former employer at Legendary Journeys. I am grateful to him for offering to take me back even though not two months earlier he had let one quarter of his workforce go. I am back in my old department putting together the components of group packaged tours. I am happy to be there. Right now, however, I am not there - I am in England! Not on company business, but on a personal journey to support my cousin Marion as she gets married to her college beau, some forty years after they first met and then drifted apart! I was not blessed with a sister but Marion is as close to one as I could have and I am thrilled to have been given the chance to be with her for this important milestone, taking place two days before her 60th birthday. People's legendary journeys will just have to wait a couple more weeks!!

Marion and I share many things, most notably our grandparents. Special folk who made indelible marks on our characters - traits that we delight in discovering again and again. We also share England, Christianity and an unfortunate propensity to beat ourselves up, diminish our self worth and carry the guilt of the world upon our shoulders. Strange really because we were not raised Catholic or Jewish! With no desire to assign blame we take full responsibility for these flaws and I for one intend to shake these monkeys off forever. I am convinced that I have come to England for a reason this time and move forward with that belief even if I do not clearly understand what that reason might be.

If I have learned anything since I last saw my special cousin in Spain 3 years ago, a few months before the world that I had created began to crumble and break apart, it would be that I have to be honest. Honest and True. Honest about who I am, what I want, where I have been and where I hope to go. And True, to myself, my beliefs, my longings and my desires. There is nothing more self-deprecating than living ones life to another's standards. There is no question that we are called to put others before ourselves, to live to serve, to give and share from our bounty. There is great question though about letting others be the measure of our lives, allowing them to take our passion and person, and bleeding us of worth to enhance their own standing in the world. A life of service is a life of balance and openness, a life lived in the moment and a life of great happiness.

This may all sound like pie in the sky. Too Utopian and too Pollyanna. The fact of the matter is that we only seem to go around life once and this term is too short to deny ourselves the opportunity of true happiness. Life beyond the one we know is a mystery to all, regardless of religion, so waiting to live later is doing ourselves and humankind a great disservice. If we cannot be accepted, loved and embraced for exactly who and what we are then we must constrain ourselves to move on to a place where we can be. This is a second marriage for Marion and I wish for her that happiness that comes from owning who she is and not putting up with anything that might make her feel anything other than loved, worthy and free. As I look back to my own broken relationships I acknowledge that some of my choices have hurt others and for that I am sorry. I cannot, however, feel responsible for that hurt beyond admitting my fault. I cannot restore their souls - I never could. It is for those that I have injured to forgive - or not; to go on - or to remain in their pain. Those that truly love me, like my mum, my dad and my daughter still love me unconditionally, despite my failings and my treachery. They love like we say God loves! I hope that Ken (with whom I shared 13 years) and Rosalene (the mother of my daughter) can one day love like that too, because they have influenced my life beyond measure and for that I will be forever grateful and I will remain a part of them forever. I bless today for Marion and her fiance David, for today is where we really live! The past is gone and the future is yet to come. And I bless Peter, her love of 28 years, knowing that he will find peace and joy when he is able to bless her in return with the knowledge that love endures all things and survives beyond the twists and turns of human emotion!

May love, joy and peace follow you - all the days of your life!

Geoff

Working Mothers

I feel sorry for my daughter sometimes. She is such a wonderful mother to her two young children. She loves them with all her being and it shows all the time. She never gets impatient with them even though she may be working on her last nerve. She is true and real and constantly chooses to put others first. She is a stellar human being and I admire her tremendously.

It has not always been easy for Hannah, she is an only child of divorced parents. She grew up in a narrow environment that was loving but very judgemental of those that did not believe in the same limiting doctrine and her world view has expanded only as she has faced relationships outside of her restricted upbringing. It's the world that is the problem though, and the reason that I feel sad that we have created a society that fills it's children with false expectations about what life should be about. It is not about the accumulation of wealth to the cost of others, it's about opening our lives and our gifts to one another to the mutual benefit of all! We have lost the sense of community and sharing that defined the early Christian church and many other religious traditions too. I am sorry that she has to go to work to support her family's modest lifestyle when she is still nursing baby Hudson. I feel bad that she has this burden while seeking to raise a family. It's not that I feel she shouldn't work, just that she shouldn't have too. I am truly disheartened at our society and it's wanton consumerism. This takes a direct toll on the rest of the human family of which we are a part, it is unveiled selfishness and greed.

So how do we buck the system? Do we wait for it to crash and then lead the way in rebuilding on a purer foundation, or do we begin to show the way by changing our personal priorities and considering our choices more thoughtfully? Must we disengage ourselves from the culture we live in and create new communities of love? That may solve our personal concerns but would it change our world? Is it just a dream that we can share the wealth that is in this nation with each other and with our global relations? Senator Barack Obama is being criticized for suggesting that additional tax on the wealthy is patriotic! Well I think he's right - it is! If that's the accepted way of distributing wealth then it should be done, and heavily. Charitable giving is an opportunity to avoid heavy taxes, so give until it hurts you Wall Street executives or the IRS will give for you. 'Golden Parachutes' be damned, while the vast majority of citizens have no parachute at all! Things will not change in our country until people abandon the ethic that measures ones contribution to society in terms of fiscal productivity. Capitalism is biased to favor the few to the detriment of the many.

My daughter shouldn't have to work - she and millions like her, many with far less resources behind them. The USA is far behind the societies of Europe that make much more of an effort to help one another, even if the help is meted out by government. Isn't the principal here that our country is governed by the people, for the people? I would suggest that we look at which people our system really benefits and which people are still in need of help! Universal health care, support for all families, benefits for child care, realistic social security payments - these things and more should be the right of everyone in America. No one should have to live a lower standard than another, or stress themselves to the max just to survive. That is not the vision of Christ, or our founding fathers. Somewhere we have gone mightily astray!

May you find love and peace in your life and value only the things that last!

Geoff

The Wonder Years

This has been quite a year for me! When the Queen of England's Windsor Palace caught fire a few years back, crowning a year full of trauma and tragedy, she proclaimed it to be an "Annus Horribilis" - roughly translated from the Latin as "One hell of a ride!" I get where she was coming from, but am grateful that through it all I have learned much that will make the future more likely to be termed "Anni Mirabiles" - The Wonder Years!

I am full of wonder! Today I returned to my old job at the travel company 'Legendary Journeys' that I left, as life as I knew it began to disintegrate, last summer. I was received with enthusiasm and gratitude - and the feelings were mutual. Since that day that I handed in my resignation at lunch and did not return to my desk I have ended a 13 year relationship, seen my home foreclosed on, gone through Chapter 7 bankruptcy, experienced a radical prostatectomy due to advanced cancer, suffered a hernia repair, had my car repossessed and lost my close friend and mentor in a move to Texas! Through it all my parents and my extended family have stood by me, supported and encouraged me and never made me feel anything other than a winner!

What have I won, you might ask? The truth is very simple. I have won way more than I have lost because I have learned what really counts. That material things do not matter, that good health is a gift and the only thing that has value in this life is sharing love with others! I am at peace with myself, my parents are happy and healthy, my daughter and her family have moved back to Sarasota, I have an unbreakable bond with my little granddaughter Haley Grace, I have found real purpose in service through my church, I have started to write, my cousin Shawn is growing out of the troubles that have dogged his life for so long, I live in a cute 1920's cottage that is truly a 'house of refuge', I am going home to England for my cousins wedding next month, and now to crown it all I am back working in a place that really values me and my potential contribution to the organization. So how should I look back at this year - I'll stick with wonder any day! After all it's only today that counts and today is good! Let the year's worry about themselves!

With Love and Peace! Geoff

Great Is Thy Faithfulness

Today is my mum's 77th birthday! It seems beyond the realm of possibility that this could be true. Was it not just a little while ago that I brought her a china tea set (that she still has) with my first paycheck from a summer job? Today all I could manage was some English 'treats' and my time. For as long as I can remember I have tried to run away from spending time. Since I was just a young teen I have felt that the things that were the core of me were things that I could not happily share. I was always leaving so that I could go and 'be myself'. I think I developed this state of mind because the religion that I was raised in told me that I was not right, not only was I a sinner like everyone else, but I was sin incarnate. My very being had to change in order to be right with the God that we worshipped. This was the cross that I had to bear. Not the struggle to rid myself of the dark blot of sin that consumed my life, but the struggle to believe that I was loved in spite of my affliction. Being gay in the 1960's was anything but 'gay'. Men that found love with other men were pitied and criminalized. They were given no hope of a happy life, no opportunity for authenticity and no chance to live in the freedom that other citizens enjoyed. Into this culture came a young man who desperately wanted to live, who yearned for acceptance and validation, who more than anything wanted to feel that he was living fully to the incredible potential that was seen in him by the one who loved him most - his mum.

Today I felt that. As I sat with my mum and talked and laughed about the journey of life I felt at peace. I have long been conscious of her acceptance of my sexuality, but until recently I have still felt that I was seen as one who needed to repent and come back to God. For many years I have struggled with my Christian faith because so much of Christendom still condemns me to hell and my mum and dad have been party to that way of thinking. It has taken a tremendous effort on the part of God to convince me that is not true. "Great is your faithfulness, Oh God. Morning by morning new mercies I see!" So now, as I sit with my mum I feel not only whole, but complete. I am able to share my perspective and am comfortable with the knowledge that my journey and my faith is as real and valid as hers . . . and I continue life, growing into that potential for good that has always been a part of who I am.

I may not be changing the world right now, in fact I am about to return to full time work with my old travel company. Someone there says that my coming back is an answer to her prayers. This confirms to me that I am on the right path, that my destiny is on track and that the part that I have to play is right for me - at this time and in this place. To know that is to know peace. I often felt that unless my life was influencing many then it's mission was not accomplished. I now know that as my life touches one person at a time the ripple effect can have unfathomable repercussions and it also helps to keep me humble! To have a mum that stands beside me and encourages me along the way is a blessing that cannot be measured! Her faith in me inspires me to higher ground and her faith in God has given me the foundation on which I have built my life. "Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow! Great is your faithfulness, Oh God - to me!"

Happy Birthday Mum!

With Love and Peace, Geoff

Chasing Your Dreams

I just read an awesome book called The Alchemist by author Paulo Coelho. It is one of those fables. full of allegory, that are both ageless and timeless. The story, set in medieval Spain, tells of a young shepherd boy who heeds his dreams and is guided on an exotic journey by becoming conscious of omens and signs. His destination is ultimately reached where it is revealed that the treasure, for which he had been seeking, was . . . but I can't say more! The book is tremendously inspiring and reminds me that whatever our path has been it is not too late to follow our hearts and seek fulfillment of our deepest dreams.

That is the journey that I am on. I have a deep sense that life, as I know it, will not remain as comfortable and easy as it may seem today, and that I am being awakened to heed the warnings and to respond to the signs that are being shown to me. I must remain alert and awake and most of all conscious of the present moment, preparing myself for what I might be called to do.

Throughout history spiritual leaders have taught the ways of meditation and prayer in order to allow ordinary people a chance to connect directly and personally with God. That modern day religious folk are more inclined to let the pastor tell them what to think and how to act, is a clear sign that spiritual revival is in order. For our faith and hope to be authentic it has to resonate deeply within our hearts. Like with the dreams of the shepherd boy, people around the globe are being awakened to a new sense of connection to Spirit. True connection is like cable service, but for most of us it is more like rabbit ears! The signal comes and goes, and in order for us to tune in and prove the source we must seek it out again and again. It is not enough to merely espouse a religion, one's faith can only can help, when our world as we know it crumbles, when it is hardwired and grounded in the love that can not only comfort, but lead and guide on the mystical journey toward the treasure!

Our 'Spirit Cafe' group has recently been considering the fruit that is born in a life that is rooted and grounded in the Spirit of Love. The resulting experiences provide hard evidence of the reality of an authentic connection that goes far beyond the surface of things normally known.

Love’s tender fruit grows, making whole
A life that’s grounded, deep in Thee.
Love, Joy, Peace, Gentleness of soul,
Brings Kindness, Goodness, Self Control,
While Faith flowers Patiently!

These are the depths that I must pursue, for today is the day, and now is the time, when longings are to become reality!

Love and Peace - Geoff